
A Vaudeville Sketch. 




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DICK & FITZGERALD, Publishers, 
NEW YORK. 








PLAYS FOR FEMALE CHARACTERS ONLY 1 

J5 CENTS EACH 

p 

CEANFOED DAMES. 2 Scenes; \y a hours 8 

GERTRUDE MASON, M.D. 1 Act; 30 minutes 7 

CHEERFUL COMPANION. 1 Act; 25 minutes 2 

LESSON IN ELEGANCE. 1 Act; 30 minutes 4 

MAIDENS ALL FORLORN. 3 Acts; 1J4 hours 6 

MURDER WILL OUT. 1 Act; 30 minutes 6 

ROMANCE OF PHYLLIS. 3 Acts; 1J| hours 4 

SOCIAL ASPIRATIONS. 1 Act; 45 minutes 5 

OUTWITTED. 1 Act; 20 minutes 3 

WHITE DOVE OF ONEIDA. 2 Acts; 45 minutes 4 

SWEET FAMILY. lAct;lhour 8 

BELLES OF BLACKVILLE. 1 Act; 2 hours 30 

PRINCESS KIKU. (25 cents) 13 

RAINBOW KIMONA. (35 cents.) 2 Acts; 1% hours 9 

MERRY OLD MAIDS. (35 cents.) Motion Song 11 

PLAYS FOR MALE CHARACTERS ONLY 

15 CENTS EACH 

u 
APRIL FOOLS. 1 Act; 30 minutes , 3 

BYRD AND HURD. 1 Act; 40 minutes 6 

DARKEY WOOD DEALER. 1 Act; 20 minutes., 3 

WAITED, A MAHATMA. 1 Act; 30 minutes 4 

HOLY TERROR. 1 Act; 30 minutes 4 

MANAGER'S TRIALS. lAct;lhour 9 

MEDICA. 1 Act; 35 minutes 7 

NIGGER NIGHT SCHOOL. 1 Act; 30 minutes 6 

SLIM JIM AND THE HOODOO. 1 Act; 30 minutes 5 

WANTED. A CONFIDENTIAL CLERK. 1 Act; 30 minutes 6 

SNOBSON'S STAG PARTY. 1 Act; 1 hour 12 

PICKLES AND TICKLES. 1 Act; 20 minutes 6 

HARVEST STORM. 1 Act; 40 minutes 10 

CASE OF HERR BAR ROOMSKI. Mock Trial; 2 hours.... 28 

DARKEY BREACH OF PROMISE CASE. Mock Trial. 22 

GREAT LIBEL CASE. Mock Trial; 1 Scene; 2 hours 21 

RIDING THE GOAT. Burlesque Initiation; 1 Scene; 1)4 hours 24 

DICK & FITZGERALD, Publishers, 18 Ann Street, N. Y. 



JOHNS' EMMY 



% BautietoiUe Mtttfy in #ne %tt 



By CHARLES STUART 



Copyright, 1910, by Dick & Fitzgerald 



NEW YORK 

DICK & FITZGERALD 

PUBLISHERS 






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'4r\ 

JOHNS' EMMY. 

CHARACTERS. 

Professor Johns An eccentric old book-worm. 

Emily Summer A flighty young miss. 



Time of Presentation. — Twenty minutes. 



COSTUMES. 

PROF. JOHNS Age about 65 ; gray wig with bald pate ; carpet 
slippers, white socks, light trousers very large and baggy, old- 
fashioned fancy vest very loud, Prince Albert coat, Henry Clay 
collar, loud tie, glasses, etc. 

Emily. Light summer costume with hat and parasol to match. 
Carries dress-suit case on first entrance. 



PROPERTIES. 

Dress-suit case for Emily. Two letters for Prof. Johns, one 
on table, the other he reads at opening of Act ; a number of 
different colored handkerchiefs one in each pocket which he uses 
all through the Act to wipe his face. Large splinter of wood 
painted red. Pipe for Emily. .- 



STAGE DIRECTIONS. 

As seen by a performer on the stage facing the audience, R. 
means the right-hand ; L., the left-hand ; C. the centre of the stage. 
Up toward the rear ; Down, toward the foot-lights ; C. D. door in 
centre of flat, 

2 



(gCI.D 217G0 



JOHNS' EMMY. 



SCENE. — Parlor in Prof. Johns' house. Door in centre of 
rear fiat. Window in L. of flat. Table down L. with chair 
at R, of it, and another chair down L. of it. Sofa down R. 
Pipe, tobacco, matches, picture album, on table. Newspaper 
on back of sofa. DISCOVERED, JOHNS at table, open letter 
in hand. 

Johns. So, poor George is dying. Indeed he may have already 
passed away (Looks at letter), for this letter was written nearly 
a month ago (Reads) 
My Dear Johns : 

" I have had another attack of heart trouble, a few days more 
will end my story and I would be glad to be at rest were it not for 
my daughter Emmy ; she is exceedingly shy, but worse still I am 
leaving her almost a beggar. My strength fails and I must cease 
writing. I leave my Emmy as a legacy to you. Make her your 
Emmy and I die happy. 

Affectionately yours 

George Norton." 
(Disgusted) Well ; if that isn't just like George, he could always 
shift his burdens to another's shoulders and live happy, (pause) 
and now he has shifted them to mine (paicse) so he can die happy. 
(Looks at letter again, and reads) "Exceedingly shy." (Rises) 
Bah ; I'd as soon think she is a regular Amazon. (Begins to trot 
across stage right and left, with the open letter still in his hands, 
and working himself into a passion, wiping his face with the 
many colored handkerchiefs he has in his different pockets.) I 
presume she is one of the kind that cries at her shadow. 

EMILY (enters with dress-suit case which she drops on seeing 
JOHNS, leaving it blocking the door, begins to trot up and dowti 
behind JOHNS unseen by him.) 

JOHNS (still trotting and wiping face). Like as not she faints 
and has some one trotting at her heels with smelling salts. Prob- 
ably I shall be called upon to cut her corset strings. ( Stops a?id 
turns a little toward L.) Heavens ! I hate that sort of a woman, I 
simply won't have her in my (turns and runs into Emily) Ho- 
Ho-Home. 



4 Johns' Emmy. 

Emily {steps back a pace or two). I beg your pardon, but am 
I addressing Mr. Johns ? 

Johns. Yes. I am Mr. Johns. 

Emily. And I am Emily. 

Johns (surprised). You — You Emmy ! You astonish me. 
I only just got the letter from your — {pause) — that is I only just 
got the letter. (Puts letter in his pocket.) 

Emily (holding out both hands to him). Well! I do hope I 
am not so very unwelcome. 

Johns (with sarcasm). Unwelcome! Oh, certainly not; just 
make yourself at home until — (pause) well, until I can make suit- 
able arrangements for your future. I presume you have a trunk — 
or something ? 

Emily (surprised). A trunk? There are — (Counting on her 
fingers close up under his ?iose) four trunks, two grips, one suit- 
case, a bike, a bull-dog, an Angora cat, and a poll parrot. 

Johns (puts both hands on his knees and begins gradually to 
sink down as she mentions each thing, until he almost touches the 
floor). Is that all ? 

Emily (mocking him). Yes. That's all. 

Johns (backs away from her toward C. D.) Excuse me, I'll 
have the man take all of them upstairs 'to your room. (Falls over 
suit-case where she has left it, then picks himself up. EMILY 
(laughs and points finger at him). 

Johns (rising). That's right, laugh. Laugh just like a fool 
woman ! EXIT C. D. with suit-case in hand. 

Emily (removes hat, gloves, etc., goes R. to sofa and sits). 
Well; if he isn't peculiar I wouldn't say so. My guardian must 
have written after all. I didn't believe him when he said so, he is 
such a miserable joker, and he told me so many different stories. 
{Pause) Let me see, what was that fossil saying when I came in ? 
" The kind ofa girl that cries at her shadow ; faints and is in need of 
Smelling Salts." (Jumps up). I know very well what that teasing old 
guardian of mine has done, he has given this man to believe that 
I am very quiet and demure and that he'll never know I am in his 
house. (Determined). Won't he though ? I'll begin this very 
day to let Mr. JOHNS see that I intend to enjoy myself every 
minute of every day during my entire forced vacation. ( Starts up 
alarmed) Gracious ; I hear him coming. (Looks about) What 
shall I do for a starter. (Sees pipe on table). I know, I'll smoke 
his pipe. (Goes to table, fills pipe, jumps up on table, lights pipe, 
take's, a puff or two and between puffs begins to whistle, then 
picks tip album and begins to look through it sitting on table 
facing front, feet swing back and forth). 

Johns. I thought I heard someone whistle. {Sees her, goes R, 
excited). Good heavens ! she hits the pipe ? 






Johns' Emmy. 5 

Emily {unconcerned). Yes, I am an habitual smoker and 
there are few gentlemen who can whistle as well as I can. 

JOHNS {Shocked). Indeed ? (Pause) You arrived a little 
sooner than I expected, and I had to give the necessary directions 
about your room, but I beg that you make yourself at home. 

Emily. Oh, I am sure' I shall be very much at home. (Looks 
in album). Who is this funny-looking thing with a goatee ? 

JOHNS (indignant). Thing with a goatee? That is a photo 
of myself. 

Emily (demurely). You don't know which one lam looking at. 

JOHNS (still angry). There is but one goat with a goatee. 
No ! No ! I mean there is but one with a goatee. 

Emily. Well ! I must say he has grown much better looking 
as he has grown older. 

JOHNS (disgusted). Oh Pshaw! (Grabs paper off back of 
sofa). I presume / may read my paper and s?noke my pipe as 
usual ? 

Emily. Please do everything as usual, that is what I intend to 
do. 

Johns (sits on sofa). Well ! 

Emily (jumps off tabls and crosses over to him). Why should 
either one of us interfere with the comfort or pleasure* of the other ? 
( With apparent surprise) Oh, I am smoking your pipe (jabs it 
into his mouth). Well, here it is. (Roams about room a little 
looking at pictures, etc., then begins to hum a song ending on 
high C). 

(JOHNS tries to read and pretends not to notice her, but is very 
much put out, and keeps looking over his paper at her.) 

Emily (crosses to him). Did you ever take vocal lessons, Mr. 
Johns ? 

Johns (jumps up, drops pipe, crumples up paper). No! I am 
thankful to say I never did. 

Emily. Well, let me give you a sample of my latest songs. 

Johns. If your whistling was a sample, you had better put it 
in one of those four sample trunks and take it away with you. 

Emily. I can't, they are all full so I must let it out., 

(Introduce pretty song, followed by a dance. During the song 
Johns pays Utile or no attention, but as soon as dance begins, 
commences to show interest, peeks over paper, keeps time with 
his feet, keeps crossing and re-crossing his legs, etc. ; at fi7iish 
of dance, sits on edge of sofa with the paper held so that the 
dancer can kick the paper out of his hands, at the same time 
he can slide off sofa to the floor.) 

Emily (at end of dance), There, how did you like that? 



6 Johns' i$mmy. 

JOHNS {shocked). Under the circumstances I consider it simply 
awful, 

Emily. Well, I must admit that I could have done better in 
tights. 

Johns (aghast). In tights ! 

Emily. Huh ! Huh ! this costume does not allow of high 
kicking. 

Johns. High kicking ! 

Emily, Yes, I can kick higher than my head. 

Johns {shocked). If / were you I would keep that information 
to myself, I can't imagine how a girl having such a father as yours 
was, can show such levity and so soon. 

Emily (aside). Now I wonder what he knows about my father 
and what does he mean by SO SOON (to Johns). Do you charac- 
terize dancing as levity ? It is almost religion to me, I always dance 
when I have much to be thankful for and I am very thankful now, 
the circumstances that combined to bring me here could have only 
had my immediate happiness in view. 

Johns (shocked). The circumstances that combined to bring 
her here. Her immediate happiness, and her father's death brought 
her here — She must be a little bit off the top. 

Emily (with much spirit). I know that song; I'll sing it for 
you (begins to sing " A Little Bit Of The Top For Me' 1 ) 

Johns. Please don't sing any more, I've had quite enough of 
that. 

Emily (grabs up chair). Well then let me teach you to dance. 

Johns. Thanks, I have something better to do, besides I don't 
approve of you at all. 

Emily. Very well, I'll dance with this chair then (begins to 
dance with chair a second or so, suddenly drops chair and screams 
holding index finger of right hand with left. 

Johns (much excited. Why ! why ! what's the matter ? are 
you going to sing again ? 

Emily. No, I've run a splinter under my finger nail. 

Johns. Well, let me pull it out. 

Emily. No, you'll hurt me. 

Johns (goes to her). It's got to come out, you know, hold still, 
I won't kill you. 

Emily. No! No! No! You'll hurt me. 

Johns (business of pulling out splinter, holds up large red 
sp)linter, then lets drop to the floor wtth a bang). There now, it's 
out (to Emily). I didn't hurt you so very much, did I ? 

Emily. No, but I was afraid you would (looking at finger) and 
oh ! it's bl-bl-bl-bleeding ! 

Johns. Well, let me wrap it up, are you afraid of a little bl-bl- 
blood (business of wrapping up finger, using first one and then 



Johns' Emmy. 7 

another of the many handkerchiefs he has, making a big wad of 
her hand). There now, it's all right. Let me lead you to the sofa, 
you'll be more comfortable there (crosses to sofa EMILY sits, 
hand still wrapped up). My child, I may as well tell you now 
I am thinking of sending you to some good school ? 

Emily {surprised). To some good school. 

JOHNS. Yes, I see many faults in you that might be corrected, 
and I may as well admit that I don't know what the devil to do 
with you. 

Emily. But I graduated from Vassar two years ago. How old 
do you think I am ? 

Johns (goes up to her, puts on glasses and examines her closely), 
Well, you are over seven, but you can't be more than seventeen, for 
George 

Emily (rises, indignant). I don't care anything about George. 
I am twenty-eight years old and could teach at a boarding school 
to-morrow if I wanted to. You needn't worry about me the least 
little bit (backs him across stage from R. to L., he retires at each 
step until he sinks in chair at table). I'll leave your antique and 
mouldy old mansion at once, you are a nasty — mean — crabbed — 
eccentric old man (stamps her foot) . So there ! (goes R. and 
begins to put hat and coat). 

Johns (aside). Whew! How that girl lies. If she decides to go 

ought I try to stop her ? I'd rather she would go, but her 

father trusted me, and I really believe I like her just a little (rises 
andgoes up stage. To Emily). Won't you listen to me a moment ? 

Emily. You are nice when you speak like that. What do you 
want of me ? 

Johns (takes her by the arm and leads her toward sofa), I 
want you to try to understand me. You see I have never been a 
mother. No ! No ! I mean I have never been a father and I don't 
really know what a very nice girl would be likely to do, but you 
astonish me. 

Emily. I meant to astonish you. I behaved as badly as I 
possibly could. 

Johns. But why ? I don't understand. 

Emily. Well, you see I had been told you were very precise, 
your appearance confirmed it, and I didn't want to begin as though 
it was a crime to smile. 

Johns. But to whistle, dance and sing before your poor father 
has been in his grave a month. 

Emily. My father! What do you know of him ? Who says he 
is dead ? 

Johns. Why, I have a letter from him in which he says he is 
dead. No, I mean dying. 

Emily. You said dying (claps hands), perhaps then he is dead. 



& Johns' Ummy. 

Johns {gets table between them). You speak as though you 
would be glad to hear of his death. 

Emily. I should be glad to hear of his death. 

Johns. What ! 

Emily. I have not seen him since the night he deserted my 
dying mother. 

Johns. Is it possible you are telling me the truth about my old 
friend George Norton ? 

Emily. George Norton, I don't know him. I am speaking of 
my father, Theo. Sumner. 

Johns. And are you not George Norton's little girl Emmy. 
Didn't he send you here ? {crosses to her and shows letter). Didn't 
he send me this letter ? 

Emily. Oh, no, no ! I see it all now, and it's such a funny 
mistake {latcghs), it's simply killing. 

JOHNS {goes L.). Ha ! Ha ! Ha ! It's very funny, I really wish 
I knew what you are laughing at. 

Emily. That letter was not written to announce my arrival. 
There should have been another. You are evidently to have two 
{holds up two fingers indicating) girls on your hands. 

Johns {at left of table, sinks into chair). Two girls. Twins ! 
Good heavens ! I hope not {throws arms over table and discovers 
letter he has forgotten). Another letter, why, so there is {picks up 
letter from table and opens it). Oh, I see you are Henry Gould's 
ward ? 

Emily. You should have seen that long ago. 

Johns {still holding letter and looking at same). And he took 
you away from a drunken father ? 

Emily. I have already said as much. 

Johns. You had some little property left to you ? 

Emily. Which my guardian was afraid would cause my father 
to search for me. 

Johns. But you are of age ? 

Emily. Not quite. 

Johns. Why, you said you were twenty-eight ? 

Emily. Well, you see I fibbed. That boarding-school scheme 
drove me to it. 

Johns {puts on glasses and looks at her very severely). And 
are you sorry ? 

Emily. Oh, very. I am really a very unobjectionable young 
person when you let me have my own way. 

Johns {aside). Like most women {to Emily). Yes, I see dif- 
ferently now. When I thought your poor father had only been 
dead a month and yet you could whistle, dance and sing, I 

Emily {imitates putting on glasses and looking severe). You 
didn't approve of me at all, and hadn't the least idea what could 
make such a person even fairly respectful. 



Johns' Emmy. g 

JOHNS. Oh— I didn't say that ! 

Emily. Well, might as well ; you said everything else. I was 
never so insulted in all my life. 

JOHNS {stands in front of her, feet well apart). I sincerely ask 
your pardon, but then you must admit 

EMILY. Oh, I'll pardon you and I'll admit anything, if you will 
only promise to let me have a good time this summer. 

JOHNS. That's easy' I'll help you have a good time. Do you 
know I have never had much time to have a good time ? 

EMILY {takes him by the lapels of his coat and begins to rock 
him backwards and forwards). My dear guardian says you study 
too much. What you need is someone to teach you to dance. I'll 
doit, I'd love to, and I am' an excellent teacher. 

JOHNS. Well why not teach me to sing also ? 

Emily. All right, let's try {they introduce any sprightly song 
and dance at the end of which the curtain falls). 

QUICK CURTAIN. 



Monologues 



MAN PROPOSES, BUT WOMAN DISPOSES, is centi 

A sprightly and emotional Monologue by Lawrence D. Fogg, in which a young lady, 
•n her birthday, endeavors by the guidance of letters and gifts from her numerous 
admirers, to decide on one of them for a husband. Her criticisms are witty and 
amusing, but she fails to make any selection. Why ? — Because. 

CONFESSIONS OF A MALE FLIRT, is cents a monologue, 

by Lawrence D. Fogg, in which a bachelor, on the eve of his wedding, while burn- 
ing his love correspondence, recalls to mind some of the girls with whom he has been 
in love, with his hopes, his successes, and his disappointments. A strange medley of 
humor and heart-burnings, ending with a pathetic climax. Note — At the end, while 
the performer's head is buried in his hands, a procession may pass slowly by, repre- 
senting the girls he has been describing; similar in effect to the scenes in the 
"Reveries of a Bachelor." 

SHOW AT WILKESPS HALL, 1 he. 15 cents. A comedy costume 
monologue for a lady t or gentleman iu female costume, by Bertha M. Wilson. A 
M Take-Off " on Delsarteans in 2 scenes ; the second can be given without the first, 
being complete in itself. A sure hit. 

WAKE AT O'GRADY'S, The. i 5 cents. By William Sidney 
Hillver. A monologue for an Irish character comedian. Runs 15 minutes. Besides 
the " wake," Mr. Dugan tells all about the christening at McGuire's. Especially 
recommended. 

CRUSHED TRAGEDIAN, A. 15 cents. By William Sidney 
Hillver. A character monologue for male comedian. Depicts the reminiscencet 
and tribulations of "the palmy days" by one of "the old school." Runs about is 
minutes. Especially recommended. 



Vaudeville Sketches 

BERNSTEIN AND FIRESTEIN. 15 cents. A vaudeville sketch 
In Hebrew dialect for 2 male charact^s, by James F. Parsons. Time, about 15 
minutes. Exceedingly funny both in ludicrous topics, Sheeney hits and droll repartee % 
concluding with the song " Oh, My ! Von't We Make der Money I " for #hich the 
text and music are given. 

TWO WANDERING JEWS. IS cents. A vaudeville sketch in 
Hebrew dialect, for 2 male characters, by Harry E. Shelland. Time, about 15 min- 
utes. Full of funny and catchy dialogue ..nd epartee, and ending with a song. 

NEW CHAUFFEUR, The. IS cents. A vaudeville automobile skit, 
for 2 male characters, by Harry E. Shelland. Time, about 15 minutes. A Dutch 
brewer hires an ignorant Irishman for chauffeur. A terrible catastrophe and a racy 
dialogue in which Pat gets the better of the Dutchman. Just too funny and leading 
up to dialect minstrelsy. 

MULDOON AND THE NIGGER ; or, White and Black. 15 

cents. A dialect vaudeville Sketch for two males, by H. E. Shelland. Muldoon, 
an Irish stage-manager, meets very suddenly Johnson, a darkey, whom he wished to 
engage as an actor in a Mephistopheles drama. After a lot of funny characteristic 
talk, they rehearse Johnson's part. After some ridiculous attempts at highfalutin 
tragedy, partly in very blank verse, Johnson collapses. They close with a song. 

MA'S NEW BOARDERS. 15 cents. A farcical sketch in 1 act, by 
W. C. Parker. 4 male, 4 female characters. Mrs. Holdtight leaves her boarding- 
house in her daughter's charge. Prof. Alto-Get her calls a rehearsal of the village 
choir, but gives them the wrong address. The choir turn up at Mrs. H.'s and are 
mistaken for new boarders. Then follows an uproarious series of incidents that end in 
the Professors round-up. Can be played " straight," or with specialties. Excellent 
stance for single or double quartette. No scenery required. Time, 39 minutes. 



Vaudeville Sketches 

BERNSTEIN AND FIRESTEIN. 15 cents, a >»ud»viii» sketch 

in Hebrew dialect for 2 male characters, by James F. Parsons. Time, aboot 15 
minutes. Exceedingly funny both in ludicrous topics, Sheeney hits and droll repartee ; 
concluding with the song " Oh, My ! Von't We Make der Mon&/ I " for which th» 
text and music are given. 

TWO WANDERING JEWS. 15 cents. A vaudeville sketch in 
Hebrew dialect, for 2 male characters, by Harrv E. Shelland. Time, about 15 min- 
utes. Full of funny and catchy dialogue and repartee, and ending with a song. 

NEW CHAUFFEUR, The. 1 5 cents. A vaudeville automobile skit^ 
for 2 male characters, by Harry E. Shelland. Time, about 15 minutes. A Dutch 
brewer hires an ignorant Irishman for chauffeur. A terrible catastrophe and a racjr 
dialogue in which Pat gets the better of the Dutchman. Just too funny and leading 
up to dialect minstrelsy. 

MULDOON AND THE NIGGER ; or, White and Black. 15 

Cents. A dialect vaudeville Sketch for two males, by H. E. Shelland. Muldoon, 
an Irish stage-manager, meets very suddenly Johnson, a darkey, whom he wished to 
engage as an actor in a Mechistopheles drama. After a lot of funny characteristic 
talk, they rehearse Johnsons part. After some ridiculous attempts at highfalutin' 
tragedy, partly in very blank verse, Johnson collapses. They close with a song. 

MA'S NEW BOARDERS. 15 cents. A farcical sketch in 1 act, by 
W. C. Parker. 4 male, 4 female characters. Mrs. Holdtight leaves her boarding-, 
house in her daughter's charge. Prof. Alto-Gether calls a rehearsal of the village 
choir, but gives them the wrong address. The choir turn up at Mrs. If.'s and ars 
mistaken for new boarders, irhen follows an uproarious series of incidents that end in 
the Professors round-up. Can be played "straight," or with specialties. Excellent 
chance for single or double quartette. No scenery required. Time, 30 minutes. 

PAPA'S BULLDOG. 15 cents. A farcical sketch in 1 act, by W. C. 
Parker, i male, 1 female chs-racter. The hero tries to " coach " his sweetheart in. 
some private theatricals. Her ignorance exasperates him so completely that a furious 
^uarrel ensues. Unexpected consequences convince each that the other is crazy, and 
the fun is brought to a cyclonic climax by the intervention of Papa's bulldog. The 
piece can be played " straight," or specialties may be introduced. Time, 30 minutes. 
No scenery required. 

AFTER THE BALL. IS cents. A vaudeville character sketch in 1 
act, by Harry E. Shelland. i male, 1 female character. Scene, a plain interior. 
Time, 20 minutes or longer, according to specialties introduced. A bright dialogue 
between a youth and girl of the old Bowery pattern, with disjointed remarks and rep- 
artee while dancing the two-step, and affording opportunity for song and dance or 
other specialties. 

POINT OF VIEW, The, 15 cents. A sprightly comedy sketch, by 
Bell Elliott Palmer, i male and 1 female character ; time of representation, 20 
minutes, in which Elinor Jar dine tries to convince Fred Winston, to whom she is 
shortly to be married, that her conduct in regard to a former rejected suitor, although 
unconventional, is entirely justifiable. Fred confesses to a similar but pretended pro- 
ceeding with another young lady. Elinor' 1 s jealousy is so aroused that she calls down 
the engagement. He then proves that his flirtation is assumed merely to convince her 
that her point of view is absurdly untenable, a fact which she is gladly compelled to 
admit. Reconciliation follows, of course. An illustration of the feminine "because" 
outwitted by masculine strategy. 

PROFESSOR'S TRUANT GLOVES, The. is cents. A comedy 

sketch, by Bell Elliott Palmer, i male and 1 female character. Time of repre- 
sentation, 20 minutes. A charmingly elaborated duologue, showing how a young lady 
of extremely womanly discernment smooths the way to a declaration of love from a 
man unaccustomed to women's ways, and so terribly bashful and diffident, that he mis- 
interprets all she says and does, A fetching example of womanly tact and diplomacy. 



Entertainments and Novelties 

YE VILLAGE SKEWLOF LONG AGO. 25 cents. An original. 

very humorous entertainment in one scene. By Eleanor Maud Crane. Arranged 
for 4 male characters, consisting of the Schoolmaster and 3 members of the School 
Committee ; 5 lady visitors, one of them having designs on the Schoolmaster, and 18 
scholars, 9 being boys and q girls, more or less as circumstances demand, and 
exceedingly ludicrous if acted by grown-up persons dressed as children. The scene is 
an old-fashioned country schoolroom. The proceedings occupy two sessions ; the 
morning session being devoted to examination of the classes, general exercises and a 
spelling bee. In the afternoon session are recitations, reading of essays and songs, 
distribution of prizes, and presentation of a testimonial to the Schoolmaster by the 
scholars. 

IN THE FERRY HOUSE. 25 Cents. A characteristic entertain- 
ment in 1 act and i scene, by Eleanor Maud Crane. Introducing 15 male, 11 female 
characters, 4 or more youths and misses, a small band of musicians (real or fictitious) 
and 10 or 12 children. The number of characters may be made more or less to suit 
circumstances. The arrangement of the scene is quite simple. The action is thor- 
oughly realistic and located in the waiting room of a Ferry, passengers arriving and 
departing, some of them being typical and eccentric characters in droll and perfectly 
natural combinations. Time of playing 1% hours or mo:e, there being ample scope 
for all sorts of specialties. Particularly recommended for Church and other Enter- 
tainments. 

THE BACHELOR MAIDS' REUNION. 25 cents, a complete 

entertainment in i scene, by Eleanor Maud Crane. 30 (more or less) female, and a 
male characters (performed by females if preferred). An original and by far the most 
amusing conception of the kind, eminently suitable for Church, School and other En- 
tertainments. It affords exceptional opportunities for incidental specialties, and 
elicits roars of laughter every minute. Can be presented on any platform with acces- 
sories of the simplest kind, 

MATRIMONIAL EXCHANGE, The. 2S cents. An eccentric 

entertainment in two acts, by N. H. Pelham. 6 male, 9 female characters, also 6 
children, 4 of them boys and 2 girls. Two interior scenes. Costumes, characteristic. 
Time, 2 hours. A widow lady and two daughters become suddenly destitute. A rich 
old man proposes to marry the elder daughter and support them all. The daughters 
run away and start a Matrimonial Exchange. Applicants arrive, consisting of a bank- 
rupt nobleman, two wealthy females in search of a titled husband, a song and dance 
actor, an animal trainer, two actresses, a policeman, a wash-lady with four performing 
children, and an Irish widow. In addition to the comical situations, the introduction 
of specialties affords ample opportunity for the display of the capabilities of each ap- 
plicant. Matters are finally arranged to the satisfaction of all concerned. 

OLD PLANTATION NIGHT, An. 25 cents. A musical and 
dramatic entertainment for 4 male and 4 female characters, forming a double quartet. 
This is not a negro minstrel show, contains no boisterous jokes nor conundrums, and is 
without a vestige of " Tambo " or " Bones," or the conventional stage darkey. It is a 
simple but vivid representation of life " in de quarters," embellished with song and 
story illustrating some of the quaint superstitions and frolicsome merry-makings of the 
mellow-voiced race. Thoroughly bright throughout, the text is uncommonly well 
written, and the succession of incidents skilfully contrived, while its transitions from 
grave to gay are wonderfully effective. The scene, a simple interior, can be arranged 
on any platform ; some old garments and a little discarded finery will suffice for the 
costumes ; the " properties " are few and simple, and the music within the capacity of 
fairly good voices, such as any ordinary church choir contains. 

"WHILE MORTALS SLEEP. 25 cents. An original fairy operetta 
in 2 acts and i scene, by Rosamond Taylor, the music composed by Carolyn 
Taylor. 14 boys, 20 girls, or as many more as circumstances permit. The scene in 
both acts is in the woods, where the fairies gather at twilight. It includes a drill 
waltz with graceful figures and poses arranged for 4, 6, or 8 girls, and 10 appropriate 
and catchy songs with music and accompaniment complete, and introduces in an 
priginal way some of Mother Goose's characters, Santa Claus, etc., as invited guests- 




MILITARY PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

M. F. 

BY THE ENEMY'S HMD, 4 Acts; 2hours 10 4 

EDWAEDS, THE SPY. 5 Acts; 2J^ hours 10 4 

PRISONER OF ANDBBSONVILLE. 4 Acts; %y 4 hours.. 10 4 

CAPTAIN" DICK. 3 Acts; \% hours 9 6 

ISABEL, THE PEARL. OE CUBA. 4 Acts; 2 hours 9 3 

LITTLE SAVAGE. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 4 4 

BY FORCE OE IMPULSE. (15 cents.) 5 Acts; 2% hours 9 3 

BETWEEN TWO FIRES. (15 cents.) 3 Acts; 2 hours 8 3 



RURAL PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

MAN FROM MAINE. 5 Acts; 2J| hours 9 3 

AMONG THE BERKSHIRES. 3 Acts; 2M hours 8 4 

OAK FARM. 3 Acts; 2J^ hours; 1 Stage Setting 7 4 

GREAT WINTERSON MINE. 3 Acts; 2 hours 6 4 

SQUIRE THOMPKINS' DAUGHTER. 5 Acts; 2y s hours 5 2 

WHEN A MAN'S SINGLE. 3Acts;2hours 4 4 

FROM PUNKIN RIDGE. (15 cents.) 1 Act; 1 hour... 6 3 

LETTER FROM HOME. (15 cents.) 1 Act; 25 minutes 1 1 



ENTERTAINMENTS 

25 CENTS EACH 

AUNT DINAH'S QUILTING PARTY. 1 Scene 5 11 

BACHELOR MAIDS' REUNION. 1 Scene 2 30 

IN THE FERRY HOUSE. 1 Scene; V& hours 19 15 

JAPANESE WEDDING. 1 Scene; 1 hour 3 10 

MATRIMONIAL EXCHANGE . 2 Acts ; 2 hours 6 9 

OLD PLANTATION NIGHT . 1 Scene ; \% hours 4 4 

YE VILLAGE SKEWL OF LONG AGO. 1 Scene. 13 12 

FAMILIAR FACES OF A FUNNY FAMILY 8 11 

JOLLY BACHELORS. Motion Song or Recitation 11 

CHRISTMAS MEDLEY. 30 minutes 15 14 

EASTER TIDINGS. 20 minutes 8 

BUNCH OF ROSES. (15 cents.) lAct;l^hours 1 13 

OVER THE GARDEN WALL. (15 cents) 11 8 



DICK & FITZGERALD, Publishers, 18 Ann Street, N. Y. 






COMEDIES AND DR^.._.8JM7 401 

25 CENTS EACH 

M. F. 

BREAKING HIS BONDS. 4 Acts; 2 hours 6 3 

BUTTERNUT'S BRIDE. 3 Acts; 2J^ hours 11 6 

COLLEGE CHUMS. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 9 3 

COUNT OP NO ACCOUNT. 3 Acts; 2)/ 2 hours 9 4 

DEACON. 5 Acts; 2)4 hours 8 6 

DELEGATES EROM DENVER. 2 Acts; 45 minutes 3 10 

DOCTOR BY COURTESY. 3Acts;2hours 6 5 

EASTSIDERS, The. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 8 4 

ESCAPED EROM THE LAW. 5 Acts; 2 hours 7 4 

GIRL PROM PORTO RICO. 3 Acts; 2y 3 hours 5 3 

GYPSY QUEEN. 4 Acts; 2)4 hours 5 3 

IN THE ABSENCE OP SUSAN. 3 Acts; 1)4 hours 4 6 

JAILBIRD. 5 Acts; 2}^ hours 6 3 

JOSIAH'S COURTSHIP. 4 Acts; 2 hours 7 4 

MY LADY DARRELL. 4 Acts; 2)4 hours 9 6 

MY UNCLE PROM INDIA. 4 Acts; 2% hours 13 4 

NEXT DOOR. 3 Acts; 2 hours. 5 4 

PHYLLIS'S INHERITANCE. 3 Acts; 2 hours 6 9 

REGULAR PLIRT. 3 Acts; 2 hours 4 4 

ROGUE'S LUCK. 3Acts;2hours 5 3 

SQUIRE'S STRATAGEM. 5 Acts ; 2)4 hours 6 4 

STEEL KING. 4 Acts; 2)4 hours 5 3 

WHAT'S NEXT ? 3 Acts; 2)4 hours 7 4 

WHITE LIE. 4Acts; 2)4 hours 4 3 



WESTERN PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

ROCKY PORD. 4 Acts; 2 hours 8 3 

GOLDEN GULCH. 3 Acts; 2J4 hours 11 3 

RED ROSETTE. 3Acts; 2 hours 6 3 

MISS MOSHER OP COLORADO. 4 Acts; 2)4 hours.... 5 3 

STUBBORN MOTOR CAR. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 7 4 

CRAWPORD'S CLAIM. (15 cents.) 3 Acts; 2)4 hours. 9 3 




DICK & FITZGERALD, Publishers, 18 Ann Street, N. Y 




